Exposition – an ugly lump of glucky words authors plop into their work with the intention of getting information to the reader.
Usually because they’re either lazy or don’t know any better.
Especially if it’s glucky.
Wow. Talk about having an opinion.
There’s not much I can suggest to the lazy author, both this experiment and the next offer some ways to for non-lazies to get information to the author in a way which keeps the reader engaged and the story moving forward.
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Think I’m onto something? Take a class with me or schedule a critique of your work.
Think I’m an idiot? Let me know in a comment.
Either way, we’ll both learn something.
Get copies of Empty Sky and follow along.
For that matter, pick up several dozen copies of all my books because it’s a nice thing to do, you care, and I need the money.
I like your explanation about exposition versus dialogue. It’s a classic show-don’t-tell, with a solid dialogue description in your story. I like how you create a sense of setting as the characters perceive their surroundings. You show a dead man with money, dragged from the water. There is no exposition on the son tempted by the money. You instead write a banter between the two characters, with a lesson learned and a threat of demise by keeping the cash.
You do a nice job writing language with dialect and mannerisms within the dialogue to show the character.
Bless you!